It's so easy to wallow in misery. On a (not at all unrelated) note, I think my delocalized depression has realized that I left again and found me back. I should probably hate it by now for doing things like that, but oddly enough, I don't. Maybe it's because I'm just too tired to care right now. I'm not sure.
It's not even that I've had a particularly bad or stressful day or anything. I'm just worn out. The week has been a little rough and I'm a little battered from things that don't necessarily relate to being stressed. I think. I don't honestly think that made any sense, but I'm just throwing words down now, so it's okay (stop reading here if it isn't).
The self-loathing is back. Well, not really. Or rather, only a little bit. Maybe that's the jealousy kicking in again, although figuring out where it came from or why it's there is a tremendous challenge all its own, one that I don't think I'll tackle. Apathy is the wrong term for this. It's not apathy. I don't know that this is even depression right now. It's too abrupt and not deep enough to really be depression. Although I don't know what else would drive me to spewing my emotions all over the internet in a pathetic, nonsense fashion.
The past week has been good. Nothing has really gone wrong. I'm just...weak and pathetic and unable to do anything again. Which is a frustrating experience. Maybe it's just been adjusting to being in a different place again. Or maybe it's just me having issues again. I don't think I have anything new to say, so I give up. Apologies. Good night.
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