Stress

Well, today has been hellish to say the least. Beyond the fact that my computer decided to die on me randomly in the middle of the day and I did worse than I should have on an important task, the stress piles onward. Oh, and that's on top of the wonderful hell that has been swirling around recently.

So right now, I'm rather exhausted, and not only my body but now also my mind, is telling me to go sleep. Even though the day has been exhausting and turbulent and some other synonym of the like, I still don't feel tired. What I really want is to understand everything. But that doesn't seem to be happening anytime soon. So I guess I get to go back and try again now.

Well, maybe not knowing things is for the better. Or at least I hope that it is. Because I'm tired of confusion, tired of incessant pondering, and tired of subconsciously trying to shut it all out. When I step back and look at it, everything seems absolutely fine--each problem is minor and minute, and nothing is worth being bothered by. But each time I get back into the picture, somehow, everything just seems to fall over and gravity appears to lose its hold on the world.

We're all here trying to find something out about ourselves. We're trying to understand how we got here and what's happening around us. And sometimes, it doesn't look like it's going to work out. Sometimes, it seems like everything is happening without our control and we don't even understand it anymore. So that's when we step back and breathe. All we need to do is stick our head out from underwater and take a long, deep breath, before plunging back into life.