I'm not sure why I thought of this now of all times, but I guess some things are just conducive to particular thought patterns or emotional responses. I miss wandering down corridors I've never been in around a familiar building, or sitting in a long-forgotten corner that I haven't been in. I miss the exploration of it, even if everything was familiar.
The odd thing is, nothing here is really familiar yet. It is all yet to be discovered, new, interesting, unexplored. And yet here we are, not doing any discovering. That makes me sad in a way. Part of me really misses the anticipation of it, the excitement, and even the heartbreak. I've said it before and I'll say it again: stability is nice, but I miss the adrenaline-inducing experiences of those unstable times.
I need a new adrenaline rush. I'm not taking any risks in my personal life, nor do I want to. My professional life, so to speak, is doing just fine and I'm perfectly okay not sabotaging it. Everything feels pretty smooth for the most part. This is really approaching the sort of life I could always picture myself living and would be perfectly happy maintaining a good while in the future (with a few slight modifications). I'm really happy with the way things are going right now.
Alright, so I have no right to complain. None whatsoever. And to be fair, it's not that I really want to. I guess I was just feeling nostalgic for a bit, and maybe still am. That's okay, though. It's been happening less often, which is probably a good thing, knowing me. Things are looking up and I hope they continue that way.
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