Saturday, September 10, 2011

I Wish I Wrote More Interesting Words

I miss people's drama.  I'm perfectly fine without my own, certainly.  I appreciate the peace and quiet it provides me with, and also the stability.  But I can't help but wish that I could concern myself with other people's drama.  I like helping people with problems.  I like that feeling of desperation.  It's exciting.

I miss when I could talk to her without feeling guilty, or when I waited breathlessly to see if she had anything to say to me, or even going back to the days when I didn't know anything about him except the few little secrets that made my heart race.  I sometimes wish I could get back the excitements, the dramas, the kisses that never were or could have been or shouldn't have happened.

And I know that I don't want it back, but I do still miss it.  I look back with nostalgia on things I shouldn't be nostalgic for.  Three years ago, my life was going to hell, although I didn't know it at the time.  But it was so exciting.  I imagine I'll find new excitements here, new adventures, new people and new memories.  I figure everything will come together in due time just like it always has.

But not yet.  So all I can do is sit and wait.  Hope to find my place in this large, new world.

No comments:

Post a Comment