Shaking

I should have stopped shaking by now.  As in, my fingers shouldn't still be twitching and my stomach all in knots because I can't think.  But nope, I'm still shaking.  Trembling.  Fidgeting.  And I can't calm down.  No matter that everything has passed by now and gone smoothly, I'm still shaking.  It's not stopping, either.  No matter what I try to do.

I've taken deep breaths.  I've had herbal tea.  I've reasoned it through.  I've come to terms with the consequences (or rather the lack thereof).  And in one way, I am completely, entirely, thoroughly calm.  But in every other way, my body won't let me rest and everything is twisting and coiling and shaking and hurting and it just won't stop.

I don't understand.  Or maybe I do.  I guess I realize how much this affects me, I know how I am with such things, and how I get when it gets down to anxiety and nerves.  But, well, that doesn't help.  Even the fact that it's over and doesn't matter...doesn't help.  No, even though I know the way I am, I still don't understand this.  I don't understand my reaction, I don't understand this restlessness.  More than anything else, I wish it would just go away so that I could curl up in bed and forget that anything happened and just sleep.  But that's not about to happen.  Unfortunately.