Solitude

Solitude is a thing to be cherished.  It is pleasant and appreciated and to some people even necessary.  I am one of those.  I like my time alone, when nobody can touch me, when the rest of the world can't get to me, when I am free to think or do as I wish.  In this way, solitude makes me happy.  It lets me develop myself as I wish, without being shaped by the rest of the world.

I don't often really seek solitude.  I let it find me.  I don't like denying people when they express a desire to talk to me or spend time with me or anything.  I believe that the concerns of people I care about are more important than my own, so I can sacrifice some of my time.  I'm of the sort who believes in going with things, letting them happen as they do.  If I really need solitude, it will, in time, find me when I need it.

That's how I live my life.  When I need the time, it will find me, or perhaps I will find it, but I will do so passively and quietly, without disrupting my life or that of anyone else.  I used to actively go out of my way to avoid people when I felt bad or not be seen when I needed to be alone.  Occasionally, I still do, but it very much depends on the person and why exactly I'm not feeling myself.

Some people I simply don't avoid.  They know me well enough that I don't see a benefit in hiding myself from them.  The majority of humanity I still show a blank face to and don't allow to see just about any emotion.  They don't know me well enough to need to see my legitimate concerns.  And there are, of course, some people who fall in between.  Who I won't allow to see my deepest of worries, but will gently reveal my more shallow concerns to.  It all depends on who it is and why I'd consider revealing anything.