Finally

It took fifteen months, but if finally happened. I let it go. My ex no longer has any power over me. Even after we had both gone in different directions with different people, I still couldn't look this person in the eye, couldn't carry a conversation, couldn't fully let go what had happened.

That relationship changed me, it changed me in so many ways, some good and some bad. But frankly, most of them were bad. And I've spent over a year now dealing with the consequences of it all. I think I've finally done it though, I've finally really and completely accepted everything that happened and I can breathe again.

The idea of this individual, even the presence, no loner intimidates me. There is no longer any weight in insults thrown around or attempts to hurt me, because I've finally grown past everything that took place then.

And all of this just hit me walking back from the train today. I was listening to music, and "My Immortal" came on. During that relationship, the song took on a certain association that I couldn't let go, even a year after it all ended. Suddenly today, I realized that I no longer wanted to cry when I heard the song, it no longer meant what it had before, it no longer carried those memories.

So I can finally say it: I've accepted it. I've moved past it. And it feels so good.