This is rather worrying. What exactly is this, you may ask? This is my current state of mind. I don't know what it is. It may have something to do with the three-day weekend, it may just be the senseless flood of panic and pain that is currently enveloping me, or it may be nothing short of pure insanity. Either way, it worries me. Significantly. And I don't like that.
I have no idea what's been going on lately. I've been missing deadlines like crazy, forgetting what's supposed to happen when, being unable to get anything done, and generally losing track of my entire life. It's really scary. Because I have no idea when the next important thing I'm going to miss is going to come around and bite me in the ass.
I mean, I have no idea how I managed to misread or misinterpret that...twice. I have no clue how I missed that date being thrown out there. And I'm entirely lost as to why the hell I didn't know something else. All in all, I am in a complete state of panic right now. I feel like I have absolutely no control left in my life and I want it all to calm down and start making sense again.
It's not about to do that, though. This is problematic. Now, I have to try to get my life back together without having any clue what fell apart in the first place. I don't even know why this is bothering me so much right now. I mean, maybe it's just because this time it was relatively minor and probably excusable but I'm infinitely fearful of what happens when it's not so minor and really messes something up.
In short, I am a mess right now, again. I'm not overly reacting to this in any outward fashion, but really, I'm freaking out. I was really hoping to write a thoughtful, deliberate post today. I guess that's not going to happen anytime soon. Sorry. Again.
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