Obligated

I feel obligated to let her know this.  I know that it's not necessary or essential or even truly obligatory.  But I feel almost as though I owe her this.  She is one of my closest friends and has been for a while.  That's what you get when you know someone for that long and have the opportunity to get so close to them...you begin to want to tell them things.

I don't really feel particularly bad about her not knowing.  There's nothing wrong with that.  Hell, I don't even have the least bit of a problem lying about it.  But, well...in this case, I guess it's a bit different.  Because someone else knows who isn't her, who isn't nearly as close to me as she is.  And I feel bad as a result, I feel like I should tell her just because she is that close to me and in a way deserves to know.

I guess it's been bothering me a bit.  Only a little bit, really.  But it's still there.  So now I'm sitting here almost working around the topic with her.  I don't know.  I really don't.  I've got a lot on my mind, any number of things gnawing at me...it's odd.  And I think I'm done writing for today, because this really isn't making any sense.  With that, I'll stop ranting and say good night.