Anticipation

Well, I guess I found something to write about again...That's in large part because it just really hit me how soon this whole summer thing is going to be over.

3 weeks
21 days
504 hours
30240 minutes

Give or take a bit, but that's it. And I'm nervous and excited and anxious and afraid and so many other things all at once. Imagine what I'm going to be like the morning of...oh god, let's not.

I don't know what I think about that yet. On the one hand, I'm sick of this, sick of not seeing the people I want to, sick of dealing with people I don't want to see, sick of having nothing to do but sit and wait for the time to pass. But on the other hand, I have no idea what's going to happen after it all returns to normalcy...I've forgotten (or so it seems) how to live with people, how to deal with them, what to do with myself, and how to handle stress.

It's an entire three weeks still. But I can't stop thinking about it, fretting over it, worrying about what's going to happen. I'm completely tense, on edge, and not sure what to do with myself right now, all as a result of this. I'm sitting at work right now. I should be able to concentrate. But I can't. I really hope I don't find myself in this state for the next three weeks, because that would be extremely inconvenient.

I just want to go back. I want to get the transition over with and go back to my life. Unfortunately, I have to wait another three weeks to be able to do that. Three weeks of stress and anxiety and dissatisfaction. How am I supposed to calm down right now so that I can at least resume functioning normally? It's not working...